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Win 7 is a Big Birthday Boy!

Happy birthday, Win 7!

It's been a good first year for you--a very good first year. According to your mama, Microsoft, there have been some 240 million of your licenses sold, and there is no let-up in sight. That's selling like a big boy! And mama says you have been the most successful release of Windows ever into the market place. The best-ever OS? Oh yes!

Recession, reschmession--mama says your PC market is strong, with 1.2 billion PCs in the worldwide ecosystem, and all the credit goes to you. She is breathing a big sigh of relief, knowing that you can make up for the big drop-offs in sales of her Parcheesi and Chinese Checkers games. It's all good.

IDC backs mama's optimistic numbers to the hilt, saying there was a 4.15 percent global growth of PC units in 2009, and that number will increase to almost 17 percent in 2010, with sustained growth continuing at a rate of nearly 13 percent in 2011. Win 7, you need to hypervise yourself in order to meet all that demand! Any naysayers who call you a mama's boy will eat their words after they see the way you handle big uglies such as the Dell Latitude Z, Dell Vostro 3400, and the Lenovo Thinkpad x201 and Thinkpad. (Who's afraid of anybody named "Vostro," anyway?)

You're also racking up points with your winning personality. How else to explain the way IT managers have taken such a shine to you? In fact, Forrester says the number of IT managers deploying you on new PCs will jump to 83 percent during your second year--and you'll barely be out of diapers. No caca on you, Win 7!

It seems like everybody loves you, except some of those big babies at VMware who say you are just one more unwanted connection to the physical past your awful mama has forced down everybody's throats for so long. Those mean, jealous VM buggers think you will fall on your cute little face when it comes time for desktop virtualization. What a bunch of dumb, old propeller heads! There's even more good news, you meaty, beaty, big and bouncy bundle of love. Mama talked to LifeHacker, which helps people do all kinds of fun things with you, and they reported a 94 percent customer satisfaction rating with you. What, only 94 percent? The other 6 percent is probably in jail, or something, and they can't use you right.

On top of everything else, Win 7, you appreciate the value of a buck. Mama says you are making customers very happy by reducing their total cost of operations to the point where all they need in monopoly money to keep things humming along at top speed. She is very insistent on this point, saying "The average savings is $140 per PC per year and the average ROI is 131% in just over 12 months." (You can tell she was really shouting when she said that!)

We could go on and on patting you on the back, but the big old computer market is doing that for us each and every day. Now go blow out those candles on your virtual birthday cake 'cause today is your day!

Posted by Bruce Hoard on 11/03/2010 at 12:48 PM


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